I realized a couple of weeks ago that if I had to spend one more month staring at that old-ass banner from March, I would probably stop blogging completely.  And since no one wants THAT to happen (oh c’mon, you know you love me), I went to work on something new.

Contrasted the shit out of this pic

As previously mentioned, I’ve been working my way through Photoshop lessons – online and in the official textbook.  In my experimenting, I created one picture in particular that I loved.  It’s a shot of some leaves with raindrops on them that I took in Stanley Park; my new skillz helped me heighten the contrast between the drops of water above and the shadows below (see left).

I knew I wanted to incorporate this photo into the banner, and it didn’t take long for the rest of the thing to come together.  The rain theme is probably not the most appropriate for June, as it definitely has been less and less wet here as we approach Official Summer (yay!).  But at least this new banner will allow me to continue writing about the mundane goings-on of our wonderful slacker lifestyle without pause...which is exactly what you guys want, right?  Right.

Raindrops Banner

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I mentioned that I didn’t like February’s banner much at the beginning of last month.  Well, the feeling was strong enough that I felt compelled to start work on March’s banner weeks ago.  The upside?  I spent a lot of time and energy on this one, spread out over many days.  The downside?  I SPENT A LOT OF FUCKING TIME ON THIS ONE.  Fortunately, I do like how it turned out, and considering that this banner might be up for multiple months (hello, time-suck that is moving), I suppose the commitment was worth it.

Spring Banner

The first element in the banner is a 3-D map that Shane put together of the coastline back in his grad school days.  I blended the original color of the ocean into a softer tone to match Vox’s blue theme.  Since the wavy “water” lines are in both the B.C. flag (middle) and Vancouver flag (right side), I knew I wanted to use them in the overall design, too.  So I inserted an X-marks-the-spot on Vancouver and attached a curving line that represents our voyage there – although, no, we are not arriving (drunkenly) from Japan or Hawaii or the middle of the ocean (details, details).  Finally, I played around with the scale, rotation and skew of the three flags to give them some “flow.”  I may do a little tweaking with the placement of the date and text, but otherwise this banner feels complete.

Also, I want to point out that I replaced my profile picture with one taken using our new camera - in manual mode!  Those are my kick-ass Spongebob slippers (props to Becky!), and they are among the first subjects I shot that did not turn out looking horribly disfigured and/or discolored.  Yay for progress.

Nom nom nom

I guess that is enough narcissism for one day.  Tune in tomorrow, when I will be sure to list more things I have done that are totally awesome.  (That is the whole point of blogging, right?)

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FYI, attempting creativity at 10:30 on a weekday night is never a good idea, especially AFTER cleaning the kitchen for three hours.  And it only gets worse as the hour nears 11, then 12, then 1.  (Yes, a.m.)  Yet there I was, bannering away, convinced that if I just tweaked THAT part ONE more time, perfection would be close at hand.

It, um, wasn’t.  This month’s banner is about as uninspired as they come, but I just couldn’t bear the thought of having spent three hours trying out a million different designs only to end up with nothing.  So let’s call this one Better Than Nothing and focus on getting to the month of March, yes?

February Banner

(Also: I’m convinced part of the problem can be described by a sign I recently saw at work. “How can I think outside the box when I work in a cube?”  Hehe.  Indeed.)

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As the move approaches, I've been trying to find more ways to stay connected with everyone here.  The latest ventures I've undertaken with this goal in mind: setting up a Facebook profile and a Voyage to Vancouver page.

Joining Facebook was actually a lot more fun than I anticipated.  Not only have I been able to network with some good friends and extended family, I've also re-connected with old acquaintances.  This includes a handful of folks I knew from elementary school (who all, much to my amazement, grew up), Eden Prairie volleyball (oh, if they could see me now) and my old church (J.C. not included - haha).  It's been like a 10-year high school reunion, except including people from EVERY ASPECT OF MY FUCKING LIFE.  A little bit surreal, a tiny bit creepy, and a lot of bit awesome.  I highly recommend it, if only for the chance to view embarrassing, drunken photos of people you used to know.  (Also: you can write on my Wall!  Which is the cool kid's way of saying, "Send me a publicly-viewable message to add to my illusion of online popularity!")

Voyage to Vancouver is a second Vox account I've set up for me and Shane (who at least aspires to write a few things down while we're abroad) to use for cross-posting our more immigration-centric entries.  I figured this would be a good way to communicate what is/will be going on with the move and transition into Canadian life for those who aren't familiar with Camp Vancouver.  Because, I'll be honest, this blog is definitely not suitable for all audiences in my life (hi, conservative family members! who will hopefully never read this greeting!).  Feel free to spread the word about that site to those who might want to stay in the (family-friendly) loop.  Or mark it for yourselves, if you are tired of reading my rambling and pointless posts.  I promise to keep it relatively G-rated, although I give no guarantees about the fun factor (lord knows that's the first thing to go when I delete the sparkly swear words).

In the near future, I also plan to set-up (again) (some of you may remember my previous attempts at this) some form of instant messaging.  But I must forewarn you: I am notoriously bad about logging into said service, as there are few things more irritating to an introvert like me than getting on the computer at night and immediately being bombarded by "yO; WHATZ uP?~"s from a dozen different people.  Seriously, you guys have got to chill out until I am done looking at Internet porn.  Don't make me pull a Block on your ass. 

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Yo quiero Taco Navidad!

This month’s banner theme is puppy ornaments!  Back in 1992, my grandmother bought me the second in the Hallmark collection Puppy Love.  We shared an adoration of our family’s dog, Sugar, and thus I loved that she bought me this gift.  From that year on, she purchased each addition to the series as part of my yearly Christmas present.  When she passed away, my mom took over the gift-giving.  And when Shane entered my life, he went on eBay to find the ornament that had started it all in 1991 (sound familiar?).

Understandably, the tradition of receiving Puppy Love ornaments (now a complete set!) has come to mean a lot to me.  Though I am not normally a big collector of trinkets like these, I am excited to see what new little dog will be released each year.  So it feels very appropriate (and totally for cute) to incorporate them into this month’s banner. 

Happy December, everyone!  (And on behalf of the MN weather: welcome to winter, bitch.)

Puppy Ornaments Banner

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Wait...what?

After taking October off, I finally got my act together to compose another custom banner for November.  I wanted to do something turkey-themed, so I searched around on Google until I found the right image.  The hand-drawn quality of this particular illustration appealed to me, as did the big, you’re-going-to-do-what-with-me?! bug eyes.  (Those happy-to-be-eaten turkeys who go so far as to celebrate the holiday by dressing up in pilgrim wear?  Totally unrealistic.)

With a mascot chosen, I played around with some matching autumn colors, leaves and squiggly lines (you can’t go wrong with squiggly lines).  I had a lot of fun with it, which I think shows in the way this banner turned out; the playful, child-like feel of it is a nice change of pace, especially compared to September's somber tone.

Happy Turkey Month, everybody!

Turkey Banner

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I don’t know what it is exactly about this month that gets me down.  The early signs of dying vegetation?  A Pavlovian response developed during my school days?  Or perhaps it’s just the shorter and shorter daylight hours.  All I know for sure: I definitely don’t welcome September with open arms.

Pine Tree Banner

My new, somewhat subdued banner/color scheme reflects this melancholy.  I built the banner around a rainy picture I took on one of our many excursions to the Pacific Northwest.  I wanted something that I could play around with in Photoshop, like I did for April’s banner, so the simple shot of trees worked perfectly.

Finding inspiration from above

I’m satisfied with the way this banner turned out, although I would have spent more time on the little details, had our Internet not been such a bitch on Wednesday night.  (Damn you, crappy apartment connection!)  But that would have meant hearing this old campfire song play through my head a few hundred more times (which I didn’t so much need):

(Call and response)
One sunny day, (echo)
I met a bear. (echo)
Out in the woods, (echo)
a way out there. (echo)

(All together)
One sunny day,
I met a bear.
Out in the woods,
a way out there.

(Other verses sung in the same manner)

He looked at me;
I looked at him.
He sized up me;
I sized up him.

He said to me,
“You better run.
I see you ain't
got any gun.”

And so I ran
away from there.
But right behind
me came that big bear.

Then up ahead,
I saw a tree -
a great big tree,
oh lucky me!

The nearest branch
was ten feet up;
I'd have to jump
and trust to luck.

And so I jumped
into the air,
but I missed that branch,
a way up there.

Now don't you fret
and don't you frown.
I caught that branch
on the way back down!

This is the end.
There ain't no more,
unless I meet
that bear once more.

I met that bear
again once more.
He was a rug
on the bathroom floor.

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There’s not too much to say about this month’s banner.  I selected some photos of The Couv, placed them on a black background and viola!  A banner was born!  (If you don’t count the two hours I then spent putzing around with the placement of everything, anyway.)  The most difficult part was finding a color scheme that worked.  I know I’ve mentioned this before, but I really hate how limited the options are – Vox, are you listening?  I REQUIRE MORE MUTED COLORS TO WORK WITH HERE.  My eyeballs are starting to bleed.

Also, you'll notice that my text did not change from black to white, as indicated in the preview.  (I tried the fully black layout, too, and couldn’t see a damn thing.)  Does this happen to anyone else?  Or is it just me and my cutting-and-pasting-each-post-from-a-Word-doc self?  And who just yelled something that sounded like “anal” and “retentive”?

Prius Banner

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Me on the morning of the 21st

July’s banner is up, brought to you courtesy of Vancouver’s Cupcakes, one of the greatest bakeries in the history of humankind.  I had been meaning to do a cupcake-themed banner for awhile, and creating it for my birth month seemed like the perfect idea.  I’m not so excited about the hot pink color scheme, but it was the easiest of the bunch to match with the cupcakes’ background.  (And have you noticed how terrible that yellow one looks?  Would that work with anything not involving pee stains and/or vomit?)

As for the thought bubble caption, that is the language of lolcats, quoted straight off the I Can Has Cheezburger? website.  It fit so exactly with my own birthday attitude (why else do we celebrate if not to overindulge with cake?), I knew I had to incorporate it into my blog somehow.

The only question remaining for this new banner: how long can I go before trying to eat the computer screen?  (Answer: less than three seconds.)

Cupcake Banner

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Did you know that my fabulous, funny husband has posted his very first blog entry?  Is that not the most amazing news you’ve heard all day?  (No?  Then you clearly underestimate how much effort it takes for that boy to write something with a non-email purpose.)

So go forth, read, and multiply your usual comments ten-fold!

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